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BY LISA KAMPETER

Every month the Dining Divas have a plan. It’s simple. Pick out a new restaurant or one that we’ve never been to. Dine there the first Thursday of the month (usually). Catch up on everyone’s latest business. And then leave with our bellies satisfied, our hearts spirited, and everyone happy. Sometimes things don’t goes as planned.

In February , the Dining Divas chose Felix’s on Clayton Road in Dogtown, known for its food, drink, and art. None of these things seemed like they would interfere with any part of our plan, but some of it did. When you walk in from the bar, a “dive bar” (the kind we love) would best describe it. Then you enter into the restaurant, and you’ll notice a variety of artwork from local artists, with the walls covered with various works of art. Felix’s is laid back and funky— the kind of place the Divas love.

But here’s where our simple plan was messed with. First, the hostess looked surprised when we showed up for our seven o’clock reservation expecting to be seated all together. Yes, we made a reservation. Yes, for that first Thursday of the month, just like every other month.

Next, our attentive waitress noticed the coupons we had on the table. (Yes, the Dining Divas do take advantage of deals.) She immediately told us she could only accept one coupon per order. That was fine with us because we had several coupons with several orders. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out that way. Our entire table was considered one order. Interesting. They didn’t tell us this when we made the reservation. And defined restrictions weren’t on the coupon.

Then, the “art” part of Felix’s proved to be not so clever. The restaurant had a gallery showing. Again, we weren’t told about this when we made the reservation. What this meant to the local featured artists was that their art was being displayed and enjoyed by admiring fans. What this meant to us was that the admiring fans stood around our table all night. What this also meant was that the part of our plan where we all catch up on each other’s business wasn’t too easy with the loudness of the crowd.

Loudness aside, this night we had a guest speaker…the Safety is No Accident Diva. Complete with handouts and visual aids, this Diva gave us some informative, yet scary, information regarding impending terrorist attacks. She had us all thinking and questioning and worrying. And yet, she had us all laughing. By the end of her presentation, we all had a plan. Or at least we all planned to come up with a plan.

Until dinner arrived, the Safety Diva had our undivided attention. We’d make our plans later. Regarding our food, the Divas were divided. Some were satisfied. Some were pleased. Some would have preferred a drive-thru. A few of us enjoyed the Chicken Carciofi, breaded chicken with artichokes and mushrooms in a lemon white wine sauce. The Picky Diva says more mushrooms, less artichokes. The Part-time Diva would prefer less mushrooms, more artichokes. And the New Diva just wished less of all of it and more of a completely different dish.

The Roasted Rib Pork Chops was another popular choice at the table. Cooked with a red onion marmalade and drizzled with a flavorful horseradish sauce, the chops were tops. Plus, they were accompanied by grilled vegetables and mashed potatoes that were “super tasty”.

This became a heated topic at dinner…regarding the mashed potatoes. Real or box. The Greek Diva openly and dejectedly assured us of its fakeness. She was so confident of her opinion that the rest of us who thought the lumpy potatoes were quite appetizing kept our views to ourselves. She also didn’t like her Shrimp Santa Cruz, toasted shrimp that she claims came out of a box just like the mashed potatoes, and thought the vegetables were frozen. To top it off, we noticed we were the only table that was never given any of the complimentary tasty-looking bread that everyone else had.

Like the Safety Diva’s presentation questioned, what were we to do in the midst of this crisis? No bread. Potatoes from a box. Frozen vegetables. No coupons. And strangers surrounding us. We did nothing. We laughed so our hearts were spirited. We ate so our bellies were full. And thanks to the great company of the group, everyone was happy.

For the Greek Diva, next time, she’s going to be prepared and have a different plan ready. Like to head across the street to the Irish pub or down the street to the Mexican place.
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